I’m not planning on writing much today. That might change, but, well, we’ll see.
To all my readers and faithful followers, I want to apolog![1193407603vxM8Ce[1]](http://sampatron.files.wordpress.com/2013/02/1193407603vxm8ce1.jpg "1193407603vxM8Ce[1]")
ize for not writing more often or with more grace and less grump.
Lately I’ve been feeling pretty darn grumpy, partly, I suppose, because I’ve gotten too caught up in Facebook. I’m relatively new to it and once in a while I comment on a friend’s or relative’s timeline and suddenly find myself embroiled in a “discussion” with someone else who’s read that comment and taken issue with it.
I don’t consider name calling, “shouting” (typing in all capital letters), having people make assumptions about me, my life experiences, my knowledge or, heaven forbid, wisdom, based on a single comment or post, as a “conversation.” I realize that when people can only use name calling as a way to “communicate” it means they’ve run out of logical arguments and don’t know how to shut up. Yet, this happens too often and it seems to be rampant. Some have even felt called (compelled?) to comment on my psychological status.
Norma![129174025629rbT8[1]](http://sampatron.files.wordpress.com/2013/02/129174025629rbt81.jpg "129174025629rbT8[1]")
lly I can walk away from such stuff. My skin is not as thick as I’d like it to be, but I don’t have enough energy to waste on trivial things. I’m a Scorpio and passion is native to my sign and personality. I read a horoscope today that mentioned my “low tolerance for trivial things” and that felt very right just now.
The trouble is, it’s the responses that are trivial, not my feelings about what they’re “commenting” on. My comments are about guns, violence against women, same-sex marriage, social inequities, and other things I’ve discovered I’m passionate about (over the years I’d begun to fear I’d lost my passion for anything). However, when I comment on others’ timelines, I temper that passion and simply keep it, well, simple.
Maybe that’s why their responses also seem “simple,” though not in a good sense, but “simple” in the sense of “trivial.” ![1262608898q1jHP5[1]](http://sampatron.files.wordpress.com/2013/02/1262608898q1jhp51.jpg "1262608898q1jHP5[1]")
I think these are issues that deserve good conversation, an understanding of each other’s points of view, not vilification of a person you don’t know anything about. For all I know, they have very good reasons for feeling as they do but I’ll never know them from the responses they make.
And, of course, they’ll never know, much less understand, mine. I’m certainly searching very hard for my soul at times like this. My ego really, really wants to put them in their place. Wherever that is.
Where has civil discourse gone? I miss it.
Well, I’m a Sagittarius, and I still have sturdy beliefs and such. But I’m not above a compelling argument, nor do I have to agree with someone to see their view(s) as making sense. There are other ways of seeing/being in the world.
That said, I know that things have become so strident between my boss and myself that civil discourse has pretty much flown out the window. I’ve done my share, quite possibly more than my share, of forging this atmosphere between the two of us. But I’m weary of it, and wearied because of it. (I’m also currently on two weeks vacation, starting tomorrow; when I return, she’ll have left for two (plus?) weeks, herself.) I’m hoping to figure a way to start over, this time with both of us playing nice together. There’s already a fifteen or sixteen year age gap between us, with she being the younger one; there’s no need for any further complications from either of us.
Gun control, marriage, roles of men and women, social justice are all matters at the core of our hearts, issues we take personally and personalize. And the social networks, like Facebook, don’t always lend themselves to the intricacies of discussions about them. Yet those websites are engaging, and often in not so good ways. I get mine ownself caught in their vortexes pretty durn often.
Sheesh, if I go much further, I’ll begin sounding like my dad. Pretty soon, I’ll begin complaining about “kids these days,” their lacks of respect and such. Perhaps once again, it’s a new world—just not a very seemingly brave one.
Hi Ed, glad to see you again. I suppose all zodiac signs have the ability to hold strong beliefs about things they care about. Scorpio just has a rep for being quick to send out zingers and hurt back, etc. Not much like me, so I’ve often wondered about that. I like to think I’m a “mature” Scorp and beyond or above that or something. LOL There are also all sorts of other influences in our astrological charts that can emphasize or counteract our native urges, I guess, but I know next to nothing about astrology except to notice that sometimes it really “works.” I’m sorry to hear about the “abrading” atmosphere between you and your boss; work can sometimes be difficult enough without personalities getting in the way or making things worse. I’ve been told that’s why we’re here, to learn to work with and through relationships. One of those things I can understand intellectually but that emotionally makes me gnash my teeth. LOL It definitely is a new world, not a particularly nice one sometimes, but then nobody ever promised us a rose garden, right? Thanks for your comment. I appreciate it.
Oh Sam I know exactly how you feel! My solution is to simply ‘disappear’ every so often from cyber space. When it all gets too much for my bruised soul, I turn it off and return to my books and notebooks. Sorry you’re having a tough time. I’m just emerging from (another) one! Love and hugs. xxx
Aarrgh! Edith, I had a reply to you all ready and my browser dropped the connection. Sigh. Basically, I was saying that I wasn’t complaining about the mean comments and such – I can ignore those things because I don’t know those people and people I don’t know don’t have opinions about me that I care about – but more about the time I spend getting caught up in even the things I do enjoy reading. It’s too much time, actually, time I need to spend on important things. Like blogs and books and writing,., *G*
Well, Sam, I am planning to give up political discussions as they have taken way too much of my time and energy, time and energy that could be put to better use writing my novel and then finding an agent.
I will say this time has been good FOR ME. I have learned more clearly WHAT I think and HOW I feel and I believe this time will help me with future discussions. But I do believe that my opinions will be more respected once I have had my book published. Plus my audience will probably think more like me. Those who disagree with me will most likely never change because they seem unable to see my side on the issues.
Some people have gone as far as saying that I am hateful, yet I have never said a hateful thing toward anyone.
If this discourse is not making you a better person, I would say, let it go. We have done our time. Maybe it’s time to hand the gauntlet to the next generation.
Never before in my life have I been so taken up by political issues as I have in the past few years. When I was younger and had the energy to get involved in stuff like that, I was too busy trying just to survive and to make a living doing “all the right things.” Well, that came a cropper so I guess it’s only fitting that I understand things political better now. Still, it’s not the issues themselves that I find exhausting but simply the time I spend on FB combing through the posts, etc. Like you, I need to be using that energy to work on my book, write other things, even this blog, and, of course, read, read, read. When I don’t have the energy to read, then I know it’s gone too far. LOL And those folks who feel it necessary to castigate me for my stance, who call names, etc, well, I consider them simply trolls and not worth my time and attention. I don’t mind and they don’t matter. But they do baffle me because I don’t get it. What’s the point? I guess there isn’t one, but I haven’t had any more messages like that so maybe they got the point. LOL In any case, I wish you luck with your book and your message. As for the next generation, well, I’m discovering the power and strength in being a crone. *G*